I received a phone call today from an unexpected source. I've never spoken to him on the phone before but he's been in my life for at least 21 years. I loved his wife. By that I mean, she was one of the dopest women I know - definitely in my top 3. She loved me like a daughter. Always had a kind word or a jewel to give me. Always been one of my biggest supporters and I can still hear her saying, "You go, Girl!". whenever I had some news to share. She showed me unconditional love, support and understanding... She was awesome.. Continue to rest in Paradise Beautiful...
So her husband calls me because I texted him. I check on him from time to time since her passing. The text is always short and sweet but this time he needed clarity so he called. We talked and laughed and he, too, dropped some jewels on me. Hearing his laughter made me miss her even more, yet I laughed so hard my stomach hurt. I can see her smile and shaking her head at his stories.
They welcomed me into their family when I was dating his son. As our relationship grew so did my love and respect for her. I always wanted her to meet my mother - THE dopest woman I know. She always asked about her. Always showed respect for her. That meeting never happened... One thing I definitely regret. She taught me things when I got on my own, what to look out for, who to look out for and what moves I should make. I could talk to her about any and everything, she was my diary for real. We would talk for hours. The last time I heard her voice was a month before she passed. She said she would call me back but never did. I made sure to text her every other day. One day, I was laying in bed when suddenly I got the urge to text her, I love you and I pray you get better sooner than later. No response. I didn't expect one. I knew she was sick. However, I wasn't expecting the next text I received, which was from my ex the next day, saying she passed. I cried. My heart broke. I mourned a bit but not like I thought I would. I have no guilt or regrets. She knew I loved her. She knew how I felt for her. There was no mistake or denying our friendship. I later found out my text was the last text she received before passing. At her funeral, I didn't view her body. There was no need. My friend was gone. The body in the casket was a shell. I didn't want to remember her that way. I wanted to remember her smile, her laughter, her sense of style, so I remained seated. Her husband brought all that up. Memories of yesterday. Memories of our conversations. Memories of her love, support and friendship...
We ended the call with I love yous and talk to you soon. I will too. I will definitely keep in touch with him so I can continue to get my jewels. He made me laugh and cry in the same conversation. He made me believe in love again and new beginnings and he made me feel stronger... All I needed was a "You go, Girl" and I would have been set. Maybe next time...
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